


Erin, In Between

by jeannigrace



Series: In Between [2]
Category: Ghostbusters (2016)
Genre: Erin in between Abby instances, F/F, F/M, It's just Erin dating lots of people in between the times she dated Abby
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-25
Updated: 2017-05-14
Packaged: 2018-09-19 08:38:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9430655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jeannigrace/pseuds/jeannigrace
Summary: Erin avoided dating women for the first two years after she left Abby.  It wasn't that she was put off women, it was just that every time a woman smiled at her in a bar, or flirted with her at a faculty luncheon, all she could see was Abby's dimples.So she dated men instead.  Tall men, boring men, men who would rather talk about the failing print media industry than ghosts.After she leaves Abby, Erin begins again.





	1. Part 1

Erin avoided dating women for the first two years after she left Abby. It wasn't that she was put off women, it was just that every time a woman smiled at her in a bar, or flirted with her at a faculty luncheon, all she could see was Abby's dimples. 

So she dated men instead. Tall men, boring men, men who would rather talk about the failing print media industry than ghosts. 

The first man she dated was named Marcus. He worked at Columbia with her, a professor of sociology. He took her to museums, and they saw movies, they took silly photos together at the end of semester event the library threw. He wrote notes in the alphabet magnets on her fridge, kissed the top of her head, and surprised her with lunch just because he felt like it. They dated for nearly nine months. And then one day, she called his cell phone and a woman picked up. His wife. Erin had never vomited so much in her life. 

Then there was Joshua, a Jewish studies professor she met at a bar. He was kind, and funny, and definitely not married. She googled him just to be sure. But he moved to Jerusalem just three months into dating her. She saw him off at the airport and he promised to email her. He did, but to tell her he'd met someone else. 

Next there was Shawn. He wasn't in academia; he was a plumber. They met when he came to fix her kitchen sink. Shawn was from Queens, and he loved baseball, and he had a dog named Sugar Pants. They went to baseball games, and they did the Polar Bear Plunge together, and Erin spent a summer weekend on the beach with his sister tanning and talking about movies. They went on overnight trips together to Montauk, and Salem, and Philadelphia. She'd never been to Philadelphia before, but Shawn had cousins there who showed them around. He was nice, and she liked his sister, and she was beginning to think that he might be the one, when, after almost a year together, he met her after work, gave her a single red rose, and broke her heart. Erin threw the rose in the gutter, went home, and cried until she could barely breathe. She's hated red roses ever since. 

So she stopped dating at all for a while. As her mother always said, what will be will be. She focused on her work, and she submitted more to journals during that year than any other. She had a brilliant teaching assistant, Rosalind, who Erin helped find a postdoc at MIT. She became an adviser to her first undergrad, Jordan, who became valedictorian of her class, and credited Erin in her graduation speech. Erin had never cried happy tears like the ones she cried when Jordan graduated. Jordan gave Erin a brooch in the shape of a molecule, and went on to graduate school at Stanford.


	2. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _And then, Erin met a woman. Hannah was new to Columbia's faculty, and walked directly into Erin outside the library one hot September morning. They both tumbled to the ground, and Hannah swore so much it made Erin blush. But when their eyes met, Hannah's softened._
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> Erin's first relationship with a woman, after she leaves Abby.

And then, Erin met a woman. Hannah was new to Columbia's faculty, and walked directly into Erin outside the library one hot September morning. They both tumbled to the ground, and Hannah swore so much it made Erin blush. But when their eyes met, Hannah's softened.

“Hey, I'm sorry, are you okay?” She extended a hand to help Erin up.

“Yes, I'm fine.” Erin took the proffered hand and got to her feet. “I haven't seen you around before.”

“I'm new here, it's my first year teaching.” Hannah shifted from foot to foot. “First day, actually. I thought I knew where all the buildings were but.” She threw up her hands in frustration.

“Where do you need to be?” Hannah pulled out a paper showing her class schedule, and Erin smiled. “That's actually where I'm heading too, I'll walk you.”

Hannah smiled, a slight blush creeping into her cheeks. “Thanks. I'm Hannah Duffy.”

“Erin Gilbert.” Erin held out her hand to shake.

“So, do you teach evolutionary biology too?” Hannah asked, as they made their way to the building.

“No, I'm particle physics.” Erin waved to a colleague across the path, who furrowed his brow. “Where'd you do your PhD?”

“University of Michigan. I'm Ann Arbor born and raised.” Hannah ran a hand through her curly hair. “You?”

“You're kidding. I did my undergrad and my PhD there!”

“No way! Did you have Dr. Geller?” Hannah swapped her briefcase from one hand to the other.

“She was my undergrad adviser!” Erin chuckled. Small world.

“I worked for her for the last six years. Her kids are so lovely.” Hannah retrieved her phone from her slacks' pocket. “I was her nanny.” She showed a photo of herself with Dr. Geller, and three young kids climbing all over Hannah.

“They're adorable.” Erin stopped. “We're here. For your next class out of this building you'll need to go over there,” she pointed to another building, “but it's an easy jaunt.” She chuckled, then swallowed. They went inside the building and Erin walked Hannah to the first floor classroom where she was set to teach her first class. Erin fished in her purse for a business card and a pen. “If you need any help,” she said, jotting her cell phone number on the back, “call me. Or if you just wanna chat. Or if you wanna get a drink some time.” Hannah took the card and grinned.

“Oh, I'll definitely call you. Thanks for walking me over here. I never would've found it in time.” Hannah opened the classroom door, but stood in the doorway.

Erin shrugged. “Women have to stick together.” She gave Hannah's shoulder a squeeze. “Good luck.”

-

Hannah did call, that evening in fact, and she took Erin up on those drinks. They met at a bar near Hannah's new apartment, and Erin had nearly worried a hole in her sweater when Hannah showed up in dark jeans, a blue v-neck shirt, and black heeled boots.

“Wow.” Erin drank her in and felt utterly inadequate in her sweater, skirt, and flats.

“You look beautiful,” Hannah assured her, squeezing her hand. “Come on.”

The bar was dark and loud, but Erin took that as an excuse to sit closer to Hannah than normal. They talked and drank until almost 3 am, when Hannah stood, looked at her cell phone clock, and asked Erin back to her apartment. Erin went.

-

For three months Hannah rarely slept at her own apartment. They were wild about each other. Hannah turned Erin on to vegan pancakes, Erin introduced Hannah to the best food truck in the city, and they discovered their favorite make out spot in Central Park together.

Hannah would lay awake into the night just watching Erin sleep, and slip lipstick kissed notes under Erin's office door. Erin made Hannah lunches before they left for work in the morning, and defended her to the occasional unenlightened colleague in faculty meetings.

They drove out to Michigan together over the holidays, splitting the Christmas week between their families. Erin's mother adored Hannah. Hannah's family adored Erin. When they piled into Hannah's beat up car Erin offered to drive the first leg.

“I love you,” Hannah blurted out. Her eyes went wide. “I um, you don't have to, that's totally, I know it's only been--”

Erin put a finger to Hannah's lips. “I love you too.” Hannah pushed Erin's hand away and kissed her, hands tangling in Erin's hair.

When they got back to New York, Erin stood in her living room and took stock of her apartment. She straightened some photos, dusted her faux fireplace, and nodded. It was time.

She and Hannah were at brunch one Sunday morning two months later, at a diner in Brooklyn not far from where Erin and Abby had lived together almost three years earlier, when Erin cleared her throat. “Hannah, I've gotta ask you something.” Hannah set down her fork.

“What's the matter?”

“No, babe nothing's the matter.” Erin shook her head. “It's a good thing.”

“Okay.” Hannah folded her hands on the table. “Shoot.”

Erin took a deep breath, locked eyes with her girlfriend, and bit her lip. “Will you move in with me?”

Hannah's eyes sparkled. “Yes, Erin, of course. I'm not even on the lease at my place.” She squeezed Erin's hands in hers. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Erin's face burst into a grin and she wiggled her shoulders. “Whenever you're ready.”

Hannah brought her things over bag by bag for almost three weeks. Erin offered to rent her a U-Haul but Hannah just chuckled and shook her head. “I don't need a truck babe, I have a car.”

“You have a fifteen year old Chevy that's full of junk.”

Hannah clasped a hand to her breast in mock outrage. “It's not junk! It's camping gear and a guinea pig cage.”

“Hannah, babe, you don't have a guinea pig.”

“I might one day!”

Erin just laughed and kissed her. “Seriously, though, please let me rent you a U-Haul.”

“Nope!”

They lived together in quiet routine for more than a year. Erin woke first, put on the coffee, and got in the shower. That inevitably woke Hannah, who stole a cup of coffee before the pot was done, downed it, and joined Erin in the shower. They took the same train to and from work, and Erin usually nodded off on Hannah's shoulder on the way home. Hannah cooked most nights, since Erin only knew how to make omelets and spaghetti, and they spent every weekend exploring new places in New York.

Erin would clean the apartment, Hannah would do all the dishes and all the laundry, and consider it a fair trade to avoid vacuuming. Erin's mother even sent Hannah a birthday package not unlike the ones she used to send Abby when they were dating. Erin sat in on a few of Hannah's biology lectures and watched her girlfriend draw the answers out of bored freshmen taking the class for a gen ed credit like they were top tier grad students. Hannah sometimes crept into the back of one of Erin's physics classes, and jotted notes like she was a student. Erin would always, inevitably, find these notes to be about how hot the professor was.

Every now and then Erin would catch Hannah watching her. Not staring, but watching. She had the same look then that she did when prodding one of her students toward the right answer. Hannah always acted like it was nothing out of the ordinary, like that was just the way she looked at Erin, but Erin knew better.

After a few months of this, Erin was curious. They'd been together for almost two years by then, and she was deeply in love, felt it in a way she hadn't with Marcus or Joshua or Shawn, like a gaping maw in her abdomen had finally been sated. One evening, while Hannah was out to dinner with some colleagues, Erin was cleaning their bedroom, and she opened Hannah's sock drawer on the pretense of putting away her girlfriend's slipper socks. She certainly wasn't snooping. It wasn't as if Hannah hid everything important in that drawer when she needed to know where it was. Her grandmother's necklace, her student loan interest forms before tax time, her old dog's collar. This time, those were all pushed to the side. There, in plain view, was a small ring box. Erin's breath caught. She dropped the slipper socks and reached into the drawer to open the ring box.

It was beautiful. Rose gold, with art nouveau filigree, and an oval shaped emerald in the center. Erin's hands shook as she slipped it onto her finger. Perfect fit. “Oh god.” She sank onto the floor beside the discarded slipper socks. She held her hand out, admiring the ring, the way it sparkled, and the way it fit her finger perfectly.

Then, suddenly, she heard the door open and Hannah's voice call out for her. Erin scrambled up, opened the ring box again, and then Hannah was there, in the bedroom.  
“Hey babe, I—oh. You found it.”

“I'm sorry, I was just going to put your slipper socks away, and there it was and I know I should've left it alone and I know I—”

Hannah stepped over, gathered Erin in her arms, and kissed her.

“So. Will you marry me?”

Abby flashed into Erin's mind for an instant, but she nodded. “Yes, yes, Hannah, of course.”

-

Erin did not marry Hannah. She wanted to, Hannah wanted to, it was even legal in New York by then. But Erin woke up one morning, alone. The coffee pot was on, the shower was running, but Hannah was nowhere to be found.

Erin tried her cell, to no avail. She checked the mailboxes, the laundry room, the bodega on the corner. No sign of Hannah. So she went back to the apartment, a familiar ache settling into her bones, and made an omelet. Erin wondered if this was the same ache Abby had felt when she'd left all those years ago. She waited, for Hannah to send a friend for her things, or to send a note, or to finally pick up one of the 73 times Erin called her. She was prepared to be left, by the time there was a knock on the door.

She wasn't prepared for a police officer in uniform to tell her that Hannah was dead. That she'd been hit by a truck crossing the street, coming back from buying Erin early morning flowers – white tulips, never red roses. That the ambulance hadn't been able to save her, and they'd found Erin's name in her wallet as her emergency contact.

Erin crumpled to the floor, sobbing loud and angry and inhuman. The officer patted her shoulder awkwardly, then gave her a number for the city morgue. Erin didn't know how to do this at all, but she really didn't know how to do this alone. Her thumb hovered over Abby's name in her phone contacts, but she scrolled further, called her mom instead.

Hannah's mom wanted her flown home for burial, and Erin agreed. Erin made list after list, figured out details and arrangements, flew home to Michigan with Hannah's—with Hannah. Hannah's father met her at the airport, they confirmed the mortician would bring Hannah's—would bring Hannah to the funeral home, and then they both sobbed all the way to Hannah's childhood home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is completely unbeta'd, so any mistakes are my own. I love Erin Gilbert so much, so come talk to me about her on tumblr @xo-xo-j.  
> (There's a UHaul joke in here somewhere, but someone more clever than me will have to find it).


	3. 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Erin was single for a while then. Jordan moved back to New York, and they got coffee now and then. Jordan was dating a boy named Seth who climbed buildings for fun, and at the same time a girl named Annette who did billing for a small boutique. Erin had never known a polyamorous trio before, but Jordan, Seth, and Annette truly opened her mind. They went with her to the spot in Central Park where every year she left flowers for Hannah, and they introduced her to Lorraine._

Erin was single for a while then. Jordan moved back to New York, and they got coffee now and then. Jordan was dating a boy named Seth who climbed buildings for fun, and at the same time a girl named Annette who did billing for a small boutique. Erin had never known a polyamorous trio before, but Jordan, Seth, and Annette truly opened her mind. They went with her to the spot in Central Park where every year she left flowers for Hannah, and they introduced her to Lorraine. 

Lorraine worked in the boutique with Annette, as a buyer and a seller. She was whip smart, could do five digit multiplication in her head, but she'd never gone to college. Lorraine wore her hair in a french braid when she worked, but let it hang loose when she took Erin out for coffee. Erin told her all about Hannah, and Lorraine told her about her late husband, killed in the army when they were only 21. They dated for two months, went to the renaissance fair in Fort Tryon park together, and then Erin broke it off. 

 

Erin met a woman named Brooke in the laundry room, a longtime resident who'd somehow never crossed her path. Erin still got a twinge of heartache when she did laundry and she could still remember how much Hannah loved the smell of their laundry detergent and hated cleaning the apartment. Brooke sized Erin up while she loaded her laundry, waited until Erin shut the washing machine door and started the load, then pinned her against the machine. Erin leaned forward, raising an eyebrow in question, and Brooke kissed her. It wasn't like kissing Hannah or Lorraine or any of the men she'd dated, or even like kissing Abby. Brooke was harder, needier. She kissed like Erin was holding the secret to eternal life and she was on death's doorstep. 

Erin scrawled her cell number and apartment number on Brooke's arm before she winked and walked backward out of the laundry room. 

Brooke took Erin to a basketball game at her alma mater, kissed her at the aquarium in Coney Island, and then disappeared from Erin's life with just a note on her door. 

_I'm moving to Oregon. Call me if you're ever in Portland. It's been real. B_

 

Erin shrugged off Brooke's move quickly when she met Sam. Sam taught particle physics at NYU and they met at a conference just a week after Brooke left. They were gorgeous, brilliant, and immediately into Erin. 

Sam wore a suit to the conference, but a dress on their first date. “This is always a great way to sniff out people who don't get it,” they told her over a drink in a hotel bar. Erin didn't get it, not really, but she liked Sam and was willing to learn. Sam took Erin to lectures by gender theorists, and Erin took Sam to art installations that crossed gender boundaries. They laid together on Sam's bed, listening to Nina Simone on vinyl, and Sam told Erin that they really enjoyed her company, but they got the offer of a lifetime at NASA and had to move to Houston. 

“You could come with me,” Sam offered. But Erin knew. She heard in their voice the uncertainty. 

“I'll look you up if I'm ever in Houston.” She kissed them, softly, more good night than love. “I'm so proud of you.”

Sam kissed Erin's cheek. “I'm really glad I met you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come obsess with me on tumblr at xo-xo-j.


	4. Part 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _And then, quietly, at a faculty luncheon, came Phil. Phil was not married – Erin checked – he could talk about physics, and he had no interest in moving out of New York. He was mostly satisfied with his life, excepting that he didn't yet have tenure, and he liked quiet Sundays at art museums. He was boring, nice enough, and exactly what Erin needed._

And then, quietly, at a faculty luncheon, came Phil. Phil was not married – Erin checked – he could talk about physics, and he had no interest in moving out of New York. He was mostly satisfied with his life, excepting that he didn't yet have tenure, and he liked quiet Sundays at art museums. He was boring, nice enough, and exactly what Erin needed. 

Except that Phil and Erin were never quite on the same page. She'd aim a kiss at his mouth and land on his cheek as he turned to talk to someone else. He'd text her to ask if she'd seen some art exhibit, but she'd always have already gone with Jordan and her partners. He never quite _got_ Jordan, Seth, and Annette. Jordan never quite got Phil either, didn't think he was good enough for Erin, but Erin chalked that up to a generational difference. 

Phil took Erin to his family's beach house on Long Island for a holiday weekend with his sister, brother-in-law, and nieces. Erin adored Phil's nieces. They were funny and bright and asked her all the questions they could imagine when they found out she did an internship at NASA as an undergrad _and_ had a friend who worked there now. Phil's sister didn't take to Erin much, maybe because Erin made an off-color joke about jello molds and cow's feet, but maybe they just weren't meant to be close. Erin had always gotten along with Abby's family though, and Hannah's father still called to complain whenever the Wolverines were losing, and even Shawn's sister still sent her Christmas cards. 

Erin introduced Phil to her mother when Mama Gilbert came to New York for a visit. Phil hugged her but Mama Gilbert made a face at Erin behind his back. Bad sign. She'd never made a face at Abby or Shawn or Hannah. 

“Darling,” her mother had said while they were in a spa, later, alone. “Do you really think this man is quite your...speed?”

“Mother, I'm over forty now, I think it's time to slow down, don't you?” Erin took a sip of water. 

“Erin, you've always been an anxious woman, and you've always craved stability, but I've never seen you settle so low for it.” She took the cucumbers from her eyes and from Erin's and looked her daughter in the face. “I don't want you to wake up one day, married, and regret it.”

“I'm not Aunt Sylvia, okay? Besides, there's no danger of me marrying Phil any time soon.”

“Whatever you say, dear.” Erin's mother replaced both of their cucumber slices and huffed. “I love you, Erin. Don't forget that.”

“I won't, mother.”

“Do you ever hear from Abby these days?”

 

Phil liked reading the New York Times in bed before he went to sleep, and he rarely liked Erin to stay over, but Erin was okay with that. She could gather her things, kiss him on the cheek, and let herself out. His apartment door locked behind her, and he never did give her a key. 

They didn't live far apart, so she usually walked home, unless it was too late and then she'd get a car service. But when she walked, she took the streets slowly. There, the corner store where she'd bought her first New York Times when she and Abby moved to the city and she dragged Abby all over trying to find just the right neighborhood to move out of their sublet. There, the bodega where she and Hannah always stopped for snacks after a night out. There, the restaurant she'd taken Shawn to for brunch the first time he spent the night at her apartment. This neighborhood held a lot of good memories for her. 

Some bad, too, like the dumpster where she left all the gifts that Marcus had given her and the alphabet magnets from her fridge when she found out he was married. The cafe where she'd read Joshua's final email. The corner where Brooke had cursed out a passerby who called them names. 

But it was her home, and she was okay here. She was fine, with Phil. Even if he didn't seem to like her quite as much as she liked him. She guessed this was how Lorraine must have felt, and promised herself she would send a message on social media, just to see how she was doing. 

 

Erin was fine, she was okay, she was even happy. She was. She wondered if Abby was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this took ages. Life, I guess. I hope anyone who's enjoyed the previous chapters enjoyed this one too.

**Author's Note:**

> Don't worry, there's more. This is just the beginning of a four part series about Erin in between the times she's with Abby. Come talk to me about Erin and Abby and all the ghostbusters on tumblr at xo-xo-j.


End file.
